


Find Your Way Home

by stellarose



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Ava Sharpe Needs a Hug, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Healing, Hurt Sara Lance, Hurt/Comfort, Insecure Ava Sharpe, Legends of Tomorrow Team are Family, Mental Health Issues, Post-Canon, Protective Felicity Smoak, Sara Lance Needs a Hug, Sara Lance/Ava Sharpe Angst, Team as Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-19
Updated: 2020-10-30
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:54:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27099184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stellarose/pseuds/stellarose
Summary: Post Season-5. Sara's sudden return from being abducted surprises everyone, but not everything can be fixed as if by magic.
Relationships: Ava Sharpe & Felicity Smoak, Sara Lance & Felicity Smoak, Sara Lance/Ava Sharpe
Comments: 32
Kudos: 177





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Here we go with another post-LoT Season 5 fic, this time with added Felicity, because I've been watching some Arrow, and she and Sara have such a great relationship, and she should definitely meet Ava. 
> 
> As always, thanks for reading. Kudos and comments are much appreciated :)

Laurel’s words from long ago and impossibly far away echoed in Sara’s mind: _“You always find your way home.”_

Maybe not this time, Sara thought to herself as she lay against a cold, hard wall, hugging her knees to her chest. Wherever she was was very far from anywhere close to what she’d call home. She could picture Laurel, and half imagine her giving her a pep-talk, but Sara couldn’t hear Laurel’s voice in her imaginings, and she was too tired to invent the exact words Laurel would say to keep her fighting. However, the one line Sara could remember, which had been real once upon a time on a dock as Sara had taken her own fate into her hands for the first time in a long time echoed in her mind once more: _“You always find your way home.”_

Was her home even real, Sara wondered. When the Waverider was in the time-stream, was it even real? Did it even exist? Could it travel though space, or only time? Sara didn’t have any answers, and trying to think too much made her head hurt. Everywhere hurt, but at least she didn’t feel cold anymore. She could still feel Ava’s embrace. Or she thought she could. It had been so long, hadn’t it?

Had it? Sara had no idea how much time had passed since she’d been abducted. Definitely a couple of months. Maybe six months? Maybe more? She didn’t even know how time passed wherever she was. If time passed. If time here wasn’t the same as Earth-time, how would Gideon and the team ever find her? 

Sara sighed, but it hurt to breath. It hurt less to just stay perfectly still. She ran through memories in her mind, and surprised herself to find that everyone was smiling in them. Oliver, Laurel, Felicity, Diggle, her mom and dad, Ray, Barry, Nate, both Zaris, Charlie, Stein, Jax, Amaya, Alex, Kara, Kate, Wally, Kendra, Behrad, Nora, John, Snart. Gideon in her hot, human form. Mick looked gruff but was holding a beer in one hand and his flame gun in the other, so he was probably happy. Ava.

Ava. Ava with her long honey-coloured hair and pretty blue-grey eyes which crinkled when she smiled. Ava’s strong arms and strong embrace, and soft hands, always reaching out for Sara. Ava’s comforting words, and declarations of love and ways of making Sara feel as though she was her whole world.

_“You always find your way home.”_

“Ava…” Sara breathed, like a wish or a prayer to the universe or whatever gods there were that might be listening. Ava.

_“I love you more.”_

_“You always find your way home.”_

Ava.

…

Ava sat at the desk in Sara’s office. She’d lost track of how long she’d been trying to read the same paragraph, but forgetting that one and moving on to the next didn’t help either as she continued to stare blankly at the page. Everyone still called this Sara’s office, even though Sara had been gone for months now. They’d tried everything they could think of; John’s magic, Nora’s magic. STAR Labs and Alex Danvers were helping out with a more scientific approach. Zari had spoken to Totem!Zari to see if she could think of some way to help. Once a week, John went through the motions of completing the list of spells he thought may be helpful, just incase there was a change in the outcome. There never was. Ava didn’t want to give up, but she didn’t know how she was supposed to keep going.

“Oh, hi. You are in here.”

Ava looked up. “Hi.”

“Hi. Sorry to interrupt. I know we haven’t met, but - ”

“I know who you are,” Ava said, forcing a smile as she realised her words had come out sounding a bit harsh. “Felicity Smoak.”

“Hi,” Felicity said again, coming up the steps into the office. “Yeah, that’s me. Sorry we couldn’t meet under better circumstances. I’ll come clean as to why I’m here, that is: Ray sent me. He’s looking after Mia, he’s an amazing babysitter, FYI, and said you might need… well, I know we haven’t met, and I haven’t seen heaps of Sara over the past few years, and since Oliver’s funeral I haven’t seen her at all, but that’s as much my fault as hers, I mean, I’m busy with my life, and she’s clearly busy with hers, and you guys doing what you do means it’s not always easy just to go out for a coffee or whatever and - sorry, I’m babbling.”

“It’s ok,” Ava said. Hearing someone talk who wasn’t one of the Legends was almost refreshing. When she’d been at the Time Bureau, Ava had gotten access to read Felicity’s file, plus Sara had told her a lot about her. Ava knew that Felicity was important to Sara, and wasn’t about to push her away, as she had a feeling that Felicity wouldn’t give up even if Ava tried.

“Would you like a drink?” Ava found herself asking for lack of anything better to say. Ava had no idea what time it was, or if Felicity even drank the potent amber liquid which was kept in good supply in Sara’s office.

“I’m ok,” Felicity said. “It’s only just after lunch.”

Ava nodded. She hadn’t had lunch, but Zari made sure she at least had breakfast and dinner. “So, Ray sent you?”

Felicity shrugged. “I think Nate might have asked Ray to ask me to come. I’ve helped out STAR Labs a couple of time, but nothing is working. I - sorry, I’m not here to talk about that. Not really, unless you want to which is totally fine if you do. What I’m here to say is: I - I get it. I really do. I’m maybe the only one who does. Well, me and Iris West-Allen. The Vigilantes’ Wives Club.”

“Sara and I aren’t married,” Ava muttered, but her heart fluttered at the words.

“Yeah, well, not officially, but from what I’ve heard, that’s really just a technicality.”

“And Sara’s missing,” Ava continued, not sure why she was determined to pick Felicity’s kind words apart, or why she felt unnecessarily angry. "As far as we can tell, and as insane as it sounds, she’s been abducted by aliens which you obviously already know if you’ve been working with STAR Labs. This isn’t some vigilante mission or something.”

“I know. But I also know what’s going through your head,” Felicity said, taking a seat in one of the armchairs. “You know what she’s capable of, and you know what she’s been through. You know how hard she can fight, and does fight, and you don’t know whether that thought is more comforting or frightening, because you know how much that takes out of her, and all you want to do it protect her, and you can’t.”

Ava bit her lip to try and stop it from trembling, but to no avail. She wasn’t angry, not really, she was scared, and Felicity was right. Every word she said was right. It was all Ava had been thinking put so neatly and succinctly, when Ava’s mind had been racing around those exact thoughts for months, but unable to articulate them. “I’m sorry,” Ava said, her voice breaking as tears began to fall. She’d lost count of how many times she’d cried since Sara disappeared. Perhaps that was for the best. She wasn’t sure she wanted to keep count.

“Oh, no, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you, I…” Felicity stood up. “Can I give you a hug?”

Ava nodded and was grateful for the hug. She couldn’t help but think that Felicity felt similar in her arms to Sara, though she was slightly shorter and not as solid. The hug felt different from those she received from the Legends too. Rather than saying _I’m sorry, I’m here to help if you need anything_ , it said _You are not alone_ , and Ava hadn’t realised how much she needed that.

…

“Damn useless shit!” John shouted, kicking the wall.

“Hey! Hey! What the hell’s going on?” Nate asked, racing into the lab.

Ava stood to the side, feeling empty. John had gone through his usual routine of spells to try and locate Sara, and as usual, nothing had worked. John had even tried a new spell Astra had come across in some ancient spell-book, but even after almost a fortnight tracking down required items and memorising the incantations, they’d still ended up in the same situation as usual.

“It didn’t work,” Ava muttered, crossing the lab. She hoped her disappointment didn’t show too much in her voice or demeanour. “Don’t beat yourself up, John. It - we tried. You tried. Don’t kick the walls, Gideon doesn’t like it. I’m going to go see if there’s anything in the timeline that needs attention.”

Nate and John watched Ava leave. John took a deep breath and exhaled loudly.

“Better luck next week, ‘ey?” he said as much to himself as to Nate, though he scarcely believed it. “I just thought… I really thought that one would work, ya know? That it’d give us something, some hope… I need a drink.”

“I think Ava will want us to go on whatever mission she finds,” Nate said, not sure if he should stay with John, or go and find Ava. He found it hard to tell when Ava wanted company and when she wanted to be left alone.

“Yeah, yeah,” John said. “D’ya know how draining doing this sort of magic for hours is? Doesn’t matter; it’s for Sara, and she’s worth it. I’ll go on whatever adventures Ava finds so long as I don’t have to play fucking dress-ups.”

“That’s the spirit,” Nate said, wishing he sounded more hopeful himself. “You go get a refreshment, I’ll go see if Ava has found us a distraction.”

“Is she all right, mate?” John asked.

Nate sighed. “I don’t know.”

John nodded slowly. “Sara’d fucking kill us if anything happened to her.”

“I know,” Nate said. “But Sara not being here is…”

“Yeah, I know,” John said. “It feels like a lifetime ago that I reunited her soul with her body. Whoever would of thought that that lost, tiny assassin would end up being the heart and soul that holds this team of misfits together?”

…

Every bit of survival training the League had ever taught Sara kicked in. She didn’t know where (or when, for that matter) she was, or why she was suddenly dumped back on earth, but she is definitely here, on planet Earth. There was grass and mud and huge trees and the wind was cold, but Sara was already so cold she barely noticed it. On top of that, it was pouring with rain. Sara lifted her head to the sky, opened her mouth and let some of the rain fall in. She couldn’t remember when she last ate a proper meal or had a thirst-quenching drink of water, but the big, heavy drops were better than nothing. After a moment, Sara lowered her head, wiped the water out of her eyes and started walking. She listened for traffic, but found it hard to hear over the wind and the rain.

Sometime later, Sara came across a creek and began to follow it downstream. Not knowing where it’s come from, she didn’t drink from it, and knew she was too unstable on her feet to trust herself on the slippery rocks. She didn’t know how long she’s been walking, but she was still cold and the rain continued pouring down.

Later again, the stream flowed into a small river or larger creek. Sara didn’t know when a creek becomes a river, but she was sure she know someone who would. Someone like Ava. Sara’s mind felt fuzzy and she was desperately tired, but she couldn’t stop now. She raised her head to get a few drops of rainwater on her tongue and saw moving, flashing lights go by overhead. It took Sara a moment to realise what she’s looking at, and when the realisation hit her, she almost wanted to cry. It was a plane coming in to land. She must be somewhat near a city. Sara kept following the water.

The little river flowed into a massive one, which passed under a motorway bridge. Sara didn’t know what time of year it was, but it was getting dark, and fast. The relentless rain and heavy clouds meant there was little twilight. Sara didn’t want to walk all night, but didn’t trust that under the motorway bridge would stay dry. With this much rain, the river could burst it’s banks. She kept walking. There was a turn-off on the motorway, and a big green sign, all lit up. Sara rubbed her eyes, and wondered if she was seeing things, or if what she was reading was correct.

STAR CITY

EXIT ⬈ ONLY 

…

Felicity had just settled on the couch when there was a knock at the door.

“Seriously?” she muttered and sighed, leaning back against the cushions. She’d finally gotten comfortable, turned on the TV and opened up the Netflix app, ready for a couple of episodes of one of the many shows she was part-way through and should probably try to finish. There was another knock.

“Ok, ok, I’m coming,” she said, prying herself up. “Does the random nighttime caller know that I actually got Mia to sleep fairly easily tonight and so I really don’t want the rest of my evening interrupted, please? My gosh if whoever this is wakes her up, they are getting her back to sleep. Getting teething toddlers to sleep is not easy and - ”

There was a singular knock, though softer this time. Felicity paused for a moment, half-listening for Mia, half hoping to hear the interrupter of her evening disappear down the hallway. She reached the door and opened it slowly.

“Oh my gosh,” she gasped upon seeing the sad, wet figure on the other side. “Sara!”

Sara shuffled forward, and fell into Felicity’s arms.


	2. Chapter 2

“Please help,” Sara breathed, closing her eyes as she rested her head against Felicity’s shoulder. Now that she was here, her last reserves of energy and adrenaline began to fade away.

“Oh, god, Sara. Of course, of course,” Felicity said, effectively dragging Sara into the apartment and closing the door with her foot. She took Sara straight to the ensuite, not wanting to use the family bathroom as Will was likely to emerge form his room at any moment, and the bath was full of baby bath toys.

“What are you doing here?” Felicity heard herself ask before she realised how rude that sounded. “I mean, not that I’m worried or anything, Oliver definitely came home in worse condition all the time. Oh, and there was that one time Laurel brought you back and you were actually dead. That sucked. So, I guess I am worried, because you are drenched and freezing and supposed to be abducted by aliens, but I guess you’re back now? Wait, you’re not dying, are you?”

“Hope not,” Sara breathed as she sunk down against the tiled wall once they reached the ensuite.

“Do I need to take you to the hospital?” Felicity asked, bobbing down in front of Sara. "Should I? You look like I should. Like that would be the responsible thing to do.”

“No, I…”

“Because I will wake up my baby, and take you. Sara, I am not losing you again, ok? You are the strongest person I know, tied with Ollie, but even you have limits.”

“Is it weird that I know what it feels like when I’m dying?” Sara asked, her voice croaky and sounding far away. “Because I know. And this isn’t it.”

“Yeah, well, you’re freezing,” Felicity said, still holding Sara’s hand, and noticing that her fingers were almost blue with cold, as were her lips. She was deathly pale, and looked as though she hadn’t slept for weeks. “Did you know that STAR Labs is looking for you? And Alex Danvers? And of course Ava and your team? Do they - does anyone know you’re here?”

Sara half-shrugged.

Felicity nodded, taking Sara’s shrug to mean ‘no’. “Ok. You should have a shower. Can you shower yourself? I mean, if you really need help, I can do it, but…”

“I can do it…” Sara breathed, trying to force herself to her feet.

Felicity grabbed her arms and pulled her up. “I don’t remember you being so skinny. You know what, you shower, I’ll find you something to wear, and get you something to eat and tucked into bed. Obviously, also I will contact your team, and STAR Labs and Alex and everything will be ok, ok?”

“‘K,” Sara breathed.

“Ok,” Felicity nodded. She hurriedly grabbed some towels and some comfortable, clean pyjamas for Sara to change into once she was done while Sara slowly and painfully removed her wet clothing.

“Oh, you’re still kinda ripped,” Felicity said and blushed. She had been trying not to look, but Sara’s body was right there and even though it was in far from perfect condition, it was still very pretty. “But you have had the shit kicked out of you and have a lot more ribs showing than is probably healthy. Which you obviously already know, and don’t need me to talk about. Ouch, look at your feet.”

“I’m ok,” Sara said, not caring if Felicity saw her mostly undressed. It was nothing she hadn’t seen before. “I’ll shower. I’ll be ok.”

“Ok,” Felicity said. “I’ll leave you to it. Call out if you need me,” she said, stepping out of the bathroom but leaving the door ajar incase Sara did call. She went back to the living room to find her phone and called Ava, but her phone went straight to voicemail, and frustratingly John’s phone did the same. Felicity then sent a frantic message to Ray Palmer, hoping someone would get back to her.

“What’s going on?” William asked, appearing in the kitchen.

“Oh! Gosh, Will, you gave me a fright.”

“Is someone here?” William asked.

“Yes,” Felicity said, deciding there was no point in lying as William would be able to hear the water running in the ensuite if nothing else. “A friend of mine. And your dad’s. She - I think she’s hurt. Well, she - she is hurt, but she’s ok, I think. I - I’m not a doctor, but I’ve seen her and your dad beaten up plenty of times before so I - well, I’m trying to get in touch with her people now. They’ll want to know she’s safe.”

William nodded. “So I’m guessing I need to stay out of the way?”

“I - what, no, buddy, this is your house too. But I - I don’t know how well Sara is, or what’s going on, or… I just really need to hear back from Ava or John or Ray, and…”

“Sara Lance?”

“Yeah,” Felicity said, taking a deep breath.

“Oh,” said William. “She’s kinda cool. Well, I’m gunna go play computer games.”

“Don’t stay up too late,” Felicity said.

“Yeah, ok,” William said. “Is Sara staying over?”

“I don’t know,” Felicity said. “As I said, I really need to hear back from Ava or one of the guys, and - ”

“Yeah, I got it. Don’t wake Mia and stay out of the way.”

“William, I - ”

“I’m not worried, Felicity,” William said. “You deal with Sara, I’ll go beat up some crappy twelve year-olds on computer games.”

“I - that’s not a very good attitude. And you’re not much older than them! What game are you - oh never mind,” Felicity muttered as she heard William’s bedroom door close. She’d try talking to him tomorrow.

By then the water running in the shower had stopped, so Felicity filled a drink-bottle with water, grabbed a packet of dry crackers, and returned to the bedroom.

“Need a hand, Sara?” she asked, lightly tapping on the ensuite door.

“Umm…” Sara said.

Felicity peered in, and noticed Sara was tangled in the top. Felicity entered the ensuite and gently sorted Sara’s clothing out, accidentally touching her skin and feeling how cold she still felt despite clearly having a hot shower as the bathroom mirror was all fogged up.

“Do you feel ok?”

“No,” Sara admitted, not entirely sure how she was still standing.

Felicity handed Sara the drink bottle and Sara drank greedily, feeling the water running down to her stomach.

“I’ve tried to contact Ava, John and Ray. Hopefully someone will get back to me soon.”

“They will,” Sara said.

Felicity nodded. “Well, you’re welcome to stay here for as long as you need to. Want me to comb your hair?”

“Please,” Sara said. She sat down on the toilet lid while Felicity found the anti-tangle spray and a comb.

“Not that I’m worried that you came here, in fact, I like that you are because I was super concerned about the whole alien-kidnapping thing, but - why are you here?” Felicity asked, gently combing Sara’s damp hair. “I mean, at my place? I - sorry, this isn’t coming out right.”

“Dad would panic if I showed up like this,” Sara said, sipping at the last of the water while Felicity tugged gently at her hair. “Don’t know Ray’s address. I’ve got no tech, no money, and the motorway sign said Star City so I had to think of someone and you’re pretty great, so…”

“I was your remaining option,” Felicity said.

“As soon as I knew where I was, you were my first thought,” Sara said, feeling a shiver go through her and she was glad she was sitting down, held onto the sink for additional support.

“Where were you?” Felicity asked, trying not to look at Sara’s badly blistered and bruised feet.

Sara shrugged. “Out… somewhere. I don’t know. I think I was just left there.”

Felicity nodded, thought Sara hadn’t really answered her question, and finishing combing Sara’s hair. “Would you like something to eat?”

Sara shook her head. “Just sleep.”

“Ok, yeah, sleep. Umm, is my bed ok? That’s not too weird or anything?”

“I’m wearing your knickers, pyjamas and deodorant,” Sara said, looking up at Felicity with tired eyes. “Sleeping in your bed is not too weird.”

“Yeah, right, of course,” Felicity said, holding Sara’s hand as she led her to the bed. Felicity pulled back the covers and Sara sat down heavily. “I’m gunna patch up your feet, ok?”

Sara shrugged. “I can’t really feel them.”

“Well, that’s not normal,” Felicity said. She returned to the bathroom and grabbed the first aid kit and a hand-towel, which she placed on the pillow. Sara lay down, and Felicity gently took one foot at a time, applying ointment and cream and gently bandaging them up.

“Gideon’ll fix me,” Sara said, struggling to keep her eyes open.

“Stupid Ray. Why hasn’t he replied? I bet he’s distracted by god knows what,” Felicity said. “You can go to sleep, Sara. I’ll tuck you in, and the electric blanket should really start working in a minute, because you’re still freezing.”

“Mmm,” Sara said, closing her eyes. “Ava’ll come…”

“Yeah,” Felicity said. “Ava and all your team. They’re probably just on a mission or something, right? Is that what you guys call them? But you’re right about Gideon being able to help. Everyone needs a Gideon, right? This feels like old time, you know? Well, almost anyway. Back then it was more questionable levels of hygiene in the - oh, you’re asleep. Ok, I’ll stop talking.”

A couple of minutes later Felicity carefully tucked Sara’s feet under the blankets, then pulled the blankets up to Sara’s chin and tucked her in. Felicity couldn’t help but give her a kiss on the head, the way she did to the children when they were asleep. She turned off the light and returned to the ensuite, grabbing the wet towels and Sara’s clothing, and taking them to the laundry basket. She had just finished tidying up and had sat back down on the couch, wondering what on earth she was going to do with the sick and injured Sara Lance, when there was another knock at the door. Felicity groaned and stood up, dragging herself to the door. She opened it to see the most bizarre collection of people.

“The hell?” Felicity said, looking at the motley assortment of people standing in front of her, in a various assortment of clothing from seemingly all time periods.

“Is Ray here?” a smiling young man with dark, flopping hair, wearing a checked flannel shirt with silk breeches and stockings asked.

“Nate?” Felicity asked, spotting a familiar face and feeling relief surge through her. Taking a second look at the Legends, it certainly looked as though the inmates had taken over the asylum, but she guessed that they’d just returned from a couple of seperate missions.

“Oh, hi Felicity. Ray sent an SOS,” Nate said, wearing sweatpants, flip-flops, and a puffer vest over a frilly eighteenth-century shirt.

“Where’s Sara?”

“Ava,” Felicity said, as Ava pushed her way forward from the back of the bunch, her hair in a neat, low bun and wearing a large trench-coat and sensible shoes. “You lot better come on in before the neighbours think I’m running some sort of goodness knows what,” she said, holding the door open. “Please be quiet because the baby is asleep, and whoever wakes her has to calm her and get her back to sleep again. Make yourselves at home, but do so quietly. Please. And there’s no beer, so don’t go looking. Ava, you’d better come with me.”

Ava followed Felicity into her bedroom, the only light coming from the living room, where the Legends were quickly and relatively quietly making themselves at home, many not having had the chance to eat or drink since getting back from their missions. Felicity half-closed the door and turned on the ensuite light rather than the bedroom light.

“Oh,” Ava breathed, seeing Sara’s small figure asleep in the bed.

“She’s really cold,” Felicity said. “She had a shower and a big drink of water and I’m pretty sure she was asleep before I finished bandaging up her feet.”

“What’s wrong with her?” Ava asked, tentatively sitting on the side of the bed, brushing her hand against Sara’s damp hair.

Felicity shrugged. “Blisters and bruises, cuts and scrapes. Her shoes were saturated and must have been rubbing against her feet. I’ve got no idea where she came from. It doesn’t mean much to say I’ve seen her looking worse, since I’ve seen her actually dead, so, well… I - I guess you’ll want to take her back to the Waverider. Gideon can help her, right?”

Ava nodded. “Do you mind if we stay here for a little while? I - I might send the team back before they accidentally wreck your place, which is really nice, by the way. If Sara’s not in any immediate danger I - I just need to be alone with her for a little while.”

“Of course,” Felicity said. “Take your time. However long you need.”

“Is it selfish?” Ava asked, still stroking Sara’s hair, unable to take her eyes off the tiny amount of her girlfriend which wasn’t covered by the blankets.

“Is what selfish?” Felicity asked.

Ava swallowed. “I don’t want the team to see her yet. I don’t want to take her to Gideon. If she’s comfortable here… I - I just need a moment, me and her…”

“I’ll be in the kitchen,” Felicity said kindly. “Want me to tell the team anything?”

“Give me a few minutes,” Ava said, “Then I’ll come send them back myself.”

Felicity nodded and closed the door on her way out. Ava sighed heavily, and lay her head on the pillow beside Sara’s. She could just hear Sara’s breathing. Her skin felt cold. Ava tucked a hand under the blankets, and could feel the warmth from the electric blanket. She should be ecstatic and overcome with relief, but instead she just felt tired.

“Sara?” Ava whispered. “I don’t want to wake you, but… I kinda want to see you awake, if that makes sense. Please, please be ok, baby. Please let me know that I’m doing the right thing by not rushing you back to the Waverider. I - I am holding on by a thread, Sara. I’m going to take care of you, babe, I will, but I don’t know where to start. I don’t know what to do. It’s been months, Sara, almost a year, and then you just show up one dark and stormy night. It’s fitting, almost. It - it’s just a lot, babe. It’s been… it’s almost been more than I can deal with. I need to hear from you that everything’s going to be ok, because I - ” Ava took a deep breath and sat up. Sara was asleep. She should let her sleep. Ava wiped her eyes. “I’ll go send the Legends back to the Waverider before they wake up Mia. I’ll be right back, ok? I’ll be right back.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks everyone for the kudos and comments, they mean a lot :)
> 
> Some angsty Ava in this chapter.

Ava briefly addressed the team, which almost felt like an out-of-body experience, as though she was listening to herself speak. She hoped that to the team she looked fairly calm and collected, but the whole thing felt strained and Ava felt stressed. She gave Nate the time courier and gave instructions for someone to come back to collect her and Sara in an hour. She was surprised to feel relieved as the portal closed and the Legends were gone, leaving Ava alone with Felicity.

“Sorry about the mess,” Ava said, looking at the open packets of chips and crackers on the kitchen bench, the spilt water near the sink, and the smell of popcorn lingering in the air.

Felicity shrugged it off. “It’s no worse than Will making lunch, and he’s only one person. At least this was about eight.”

Ava nodded.

“I’ll take care of this,” Felicity said with a sympathetic smile. “You go back to Sara.”

“Thanks,” Ava said, and returned the to bedroom.

Sara had rolled over towards the middle of the bed. Ava was desperate to climb in bedside her, but dallied and paced, wringing her hands, before going into the ensuite and splashing some water on her face. She ignored her sad, tired reflection and returned to the bedside, removed her coat and shoes, and hoped that there wasn’t any lingering smell of the bomb shelters of WWII Cardiff on her as she slid into bed beside Sara.

“Here,” Felicity said, holding out a pillow.

Ava hadn’t heard her enter and forced a smile as she took the pillow.

“I - I’ll let you be,” Felicity said as Ava made herself comfortable, propped up beside Sara. “Definitely not the time when you need a third wheel, especially one you don’t know particularly well, and you did look very relieved when your team left, so you clearly want some time with Sara and - ”

“Stay,” Ava found herself saying. “I - I’d like you to stay.”

Felicity nodded and climbed up on the bed. Sara rolled over again in her sleep and snuggled against Ava’s side. Ava stroked her hair.

“Well, it isn’t very often that I have two gorgeous women in my bed,” Felicity said and then blushed. “I mean, this never happens. It’s never happened. The only person who is ever in my bed now is Mia. This is definitely a first because I don’t… I mean, I’m not… I - well, Sara’s always made me question my… umm, I don’t have any issues with it, I just mean, Sara’s just - well…”

“She has that effect on people,” Ava said, looking lovingly at her sleeping girlfriend.

“Yeah,” Felicity said. “If you’d like to stay longer, I mean, when the Legends come back in an hour, if you don’t want to go, you’re most welcome to stay.”

“Thanks,” Ava said. “But I should take her home to the Waverider.”

Felicity nodded and folded her legs.

“What do I do?” Ava murmured.

“What do you mean?” Felicity asked.

“I - I don’t know,” Ava mumbled, unable to take her eyes off Sara.

“Sara had a toy shark when she was a kid,” Felicity said. “It was her special toy she used to comfort herself when she was sad. Sorry, that’s not really helpful and doesn’t really relate to anything. I just remembered Laurel saying about it once. Gosh, that was ages ago.”

“I’m sorry I never met her,” Ava said. “I know how much she meant to Sara.”

“She would have liked you. You make Sara happy. You’re good for her. Laurel would like that.”

“I couldn’t help her this time,” Ava mumbled, feeling guilty.

“As one vigilante wife to another; you can’t always help. It’s so hard to accept, but it comes with the territory. You just have to love them, and pray that it’s enough.”

“Is it though?” Ava breathed, still gazing at Sara.

“It has to be,” Felicity said with a sad smile.

Ava nodded, brushing Sara’s hair. “I don’t know who I am without her anymore.”

“She’s here now,” Felicity said. “I really want to give you a hug, but you look pretty comfortable where you are.”

“Thank-you for understanding. And not thinking I’m insane.”

“Of course.”

“Could - would you mind telling me some stories? About ‘back in the day’. There’s not a lot on Sara’s official file about that since the work wasn’t exactly legal, and even though she’s told me about some of it… I think she’s more of a hero than she paints herself to be.”

“Oh, absolutely. Any stories specifically?” Felicity asked. “Serious ones or fun ones? Like the first time I saw her on the salmon ladder? Or when she stitched me up with her surprisingly soft, gentle hands? The way she taught me to fight and is a quite an effective teacher?”

“All of the above,” Ava said with a small smile, meeting Felicity’s eye.

“Ok,” Felicity said, “So, first time seeing Sara and her amazing abs on the salmon ladder…”

…

After giving Felicity a hug goodbye, Ava opened the portal into the bridge of the Waverider, knowing that would give them the most room to manoeuvre, and Nate had sent her a message saying that they’d been ‘re-jigging’ the medbay, which made Ava somewhat apprehensive. The bridge was empty, and Mick led the way to the medbay, gently cradling Sara in his arms, as Ava thought about how tiny Sara looked. She followed Mick up the corridor, in part wishing that Felicity could have come with them, or that they could have just stayed in her comfortable apartment, and almost did a double-take when she entered the medbay.

“Wh - what have you all been doing?” Ava asked, looking around.The room was decorated with golden fairy lights, a few pot-plants, and a relaxing lavender-scented candle was burning. The chair down the far end had been arranged to be sitting up as straight as possible to get it out of the way, and a large, leather reclining chair in full reclining position had been placed beside it, with the medical bracelet draped over the armrest. There was a large blanket folded up on the regular medbay chair, and a drinks trolley with an assortment of beverages and snacks.

“I told you we re-jigged it,” Nate said with a smile.

“Umm… ok,” Ava said, taking all the changes in.

“The recliner was Behrad’s idea, after Mick complained about how uncomfortable those chairs are,” Zari said.

“They are uncomfortable,” Ava said, as Mick carefully laid Sara down in the recliner chair. “So you went for a grandpa recliner instead?”

“Gideon wasn’t so keen on us putting a whole bed in here, but she agreed to this alternative,” Behrad said.

Ava nodded. Everyone seemed to have everything under control. There was nothing for her to do. She wasn’t needed here. Zari clipped the medical bracelet around Sara’s wrist, then unfolded the blanket, tucking it around Sara.

“She still feels cold,” Zari said, holding Sara’s hand.

“I’ll get my dressing gown, you can wrap her in that,” Ava said. “Then I’m having a shower.”

“Oh, ok,” Zari said. “The regular medbay armchair is here, and we got a selection of food and drink because we didn’t know what you or Sara might - ”

“Yeah, thanks. I’ll be back in a minute,” Ava said abruptly, and turned and left the room.

“Is she ok?” Behrad asked.

“I believe that Captain Sharpe is feeling greatly overwhelmed by Captain Lance’s sudden return, and though she may have relaxed a little in the company of Ms Smoak, upon returning home her anxieties and apprehension has returned,” Gideon said.

“Keep an eye on her for us, will you Gideon?” Nate asked.

“Always, Mr Heywood.”

“How’s Sara?” Zari asked, pursing her lips. She didn’t like seeing the captains this way, Sara looking so fragile and Ava so defeated.

“My initial observations show that Captain Lance’s physical condition is stable, and is expected to make a full recovery.”

“Thanks, Gideon,” Nate said, sitting down in the chair bedside the recliner.

“Here,” Ava said, returning with her dressing gown and not even allowing herself to look at Sara. She swallowed hard as Zari took the dressing gown with a thick pair of socks on top. “I brought her some socks too. I know Felicity bandaged her feet but…” Ava trailed off.

“Thanks,” Zari said. “Hopefully some more layers will help warm her up.”

“Hey, Gideon, can you fabricate a hot-water bottle?” Behrad asked.

“Right away, Mr Tarazi.”

Ava nodded. “I’m having a shower.”

“Ok,” Zari said, giving the most encouraging smile she could.

“I’ll go get the hot-water bottle from the fabricator,” Behrad said. “We’ve sure been putting that to good use today.”

Ava sobbed the whole time she was in the shower, unable to think of any way she could be of assistance to Sara, and feeling as helpless as ever. She knew that Gideon would know how upset she was, and might even report it to the team, but she didn’t care. Sara was here, she was really here, but she was sick and hurt and they didn’t know _how_ she was here and there was nothing Ava could do to help. The rest of the team seemed to have everything sorted. Ava felt redundant. Once she turned the water off and got out of the shower, she tried to calm herself. There had to be something she could provide which the others couldn’t, however small.

“Hey Gideon?” Ava asked as she got dressed, trying not to choke on her words.

“Yes, Captain?”

“Could you fabricate something for me?”

“Of course, Captain,” Gideon replied. "What would you like?”

…

Sara’s eyes flickered open, and she looked around the medbay, pleasantly surprised to find herself in a recliner chair, with a blanket wrapped snuggly around her, and a toy shark tucked under her left arm. Ava sat to her right, slumped forward with her head in Sara’s lap.

“Hey,” Sara croaked. Her body felt like lead, but she was able to slide her hand across the blanket and caress Ava’s hair. Sara had a feeling that Gideon was administering to her painkillers and related medication, but she didn’t care and could ask about it later. For the first time in a long time, she felt comfortable and safe.

“How are you?” Sara asked Ava.

Ava lifted her head and blinked. Sara smiled softly, the fairy lights decorating the room giving off a warm glow which made Sara look better than she really was.

“You’re awake,” Ava said, sitting up and taking Sara’s hand.

“Hi,” Sara said with a small smile.

“Hi,” Ava said.

“Have I been asleep long?”

Ava checked her watch and worked backwards. “About 14 hours I think?”

“What about you?”

“What about me?”

“Have you had any sleep?”

Ava shrugged. “I tried to get a few hours sleep but… Nate and Zari stayed with you. I couldn’t fall asleep so came back here.”

“Oh. I like the shark,” Sara said, looking at the toy shark in her arms. “Is he heavy, or is it just me?”

Ava nodded, suddenly too full of emotion to talk. She kissed the back of Sara’s hand. “It’s weighted,” Ava breathed.

“I’m going to call him Heavy Shark,” Sara said, grateful to have something to hold, and noticing how Heavy Shark was the perfect size for her. She suspected Gideon was behind that. “How did you know? Or, did you know?”

“What?”

“That I had a toy shark as a kid.”

“Felicity,” Ava said, worried if she said too much she’d start to cry. She grabbed a drink of water for Sara to busy herself instead.

“Is she here?” Sara asked.

Ava shook her head, handing Sara the bottle from the drinks trolley. Sara drank greedily, then placed the half-empty bottle in the cup-holder in the chair-arm.

“I’ll have to thank her,” Sara said. “I love Heavy Shark. I - are you ok, babe?”

“Well, what about you, Sara?” Ava choked. “You’re the one who’s been missing for almost a year and you show up freezing cold in the middle of the night and - and you’re not well. You’re starving and Gideon is able to help a bit, but…”

“Hey, I’ll be ok,” Sara said. “I’m sure Gideon told you that.”

“Will you?” Ava asked. “Really?”

Sara sighed. “I won’t pretend this isn’t hard. And having been more or less in this position before, starving and alone and waiting to die, and having come back from that… it’s hard. God, it’s hard, and I won’t pretend otherwise. Knowing how hard it is to pull yourself back, and how long it takes… but I’m not dying today. And I’m not alone, so that - for today, that’s enough. It has to be enough.”

Ava looked at Sara, tears burning her eyes. “But, I - I’m…”

“Come here,” Sara said, patting the blanket.

“What?” Ava sniffed.

“Lie down next to me.”

“I won’t fit.”

“Yes you will,” Sara insisted. “Why else would I be in a massive recliner chair and not on that usual uncomfortable seat? No offence, Gideon, but it is really uncomfortable.”

“None taken, Captain Lance,” Gideon said.

Ava stood up and slid off her boots before squeezing in beside Sara. Sara placed Heavy Shark on her lap, and made Ava join her under the blanket before wrapping her arms around Ava and holding her close. Ava snuggled into Sara’s side, remembering how perfectly they fit together, and how Sara smelt, despite wearing Felicity’s pyjamas and her own dressing gown.

“I really missed you,” Sara said.

“I missed you more,” Ava mumbled, snuggling into Sara’s side.

“Not sure that’s possible,” Sara said with a small smile.

“It is.”

“I need a dressing gown like this,” Sara said, fiddling with the sleeves which kept dropping over her hands.

“Gideon can make you one.”

“I like yours for now,” Sara said, “It smells like you.”

“Are you comfortable?” Ava asked, sure she was the one who should be comforting Sara, whereas it felt a lot more like it was happening the other way around. “I don’t want to put you out, and me being on the chair, and the way you’re holding me, I…”

“If it was practical, I would never let you go,” Sara said, resting her head against Ava’s and gently rubbing Ava’s back as Ava finally fell asleep.


	4. Chapter 4

Sara spent two nights in the medical bay with Gideon monitoring her every sign and movement, with Ava anxiously hovering around and the team never far away. They still didn’t know how Sara had ended up outside of Star City, and Sara couldn’t give them any insight as her memories were muddled and seemed to have big gaps. She was grateful to finally be able to shower and change into her own pyjamas and climb into her own bed, with Ava lying comfortably by her side. Being back in their room gave Sara a boost, and she happily chatted away to Ava until they fell asleep in one another’s arms. However, their sleep was disrupted as Sara suffered a string of nightmares. Ava ended up getting up early, and asked Gideon to alert her if Sara was starting to wake up or seemed to be distressed in her sleep, and went to scrub the galley before the team woke for breakfast.

Ava scrubbed the food fabricator, cleaned the microwave, disinfected all the benches, and was in the process of cleaning out the fridge when Nate arrived, shuffling to the fabricator to make his morning coffee.

“Hi Ava,” he said with a yawn.

“Hi,” Ava said, throwing out a leftover mystery substance from the fridge.

“You had breakfast?” Nate asked, leaning against the bench while the fabricator whirred into action.

“Not yet.”

“Been up long? It’s smelling pretty chemically in here.”

“Yeah.”

“Did you sleep all right? Must’ve been nice having Sara back by your side.”

“Yep.”

“Everything ok?” Nate asked as the fabricator pinged and his coffee was ready.

Ava took a deep breath. “Sara woke up five times during the night. Well, technically she woke up four, one time I had to wake her because she was - well, she thought she was drowning and you have no idea how frightening it is to wake-up beside someone gasping like that,” she said, the words all pouring out at once.

“Oh,” Nate said, putting Ava’s mug in the fabricator to make a coffee for her too. “Well, I - that sucks. Wanna talk about it?”

“No.”

“Want a hug?”

Ava paused and closed the fridge. “I just want her to be ok, Nate. I don’t want her to be hurting.”

“Of course not,” Nate said with a kind smile. “None of us want that. We all wish we could just wave Nora’s magic wand and make everything better, but unfortunately it doesn’t work like that. Sara’s strong, insanely strong. She’s been back for what, three days? A bit more? Anyway, she’s here now, Ava. She’s back, and she’s safe and she’s relatively ok. Now, come here and get that hug.”

Ava pulled off the rubber gloves and stepped into Nate’s strong embrace. She wrapped her arms around his torso. “I don’t know how to help her. Not when she’s stuck in a drowning-dream. It’s so fricken scary, Nate. It’s so bad.”

Nate rubbed Ava’s back. “Saying that it’ll be ok isn’t really helpful, is it?”

“Not really,” Ava mumbled. “But it doesn’t hurt.”

The fabricator pinged. “Your coffee is ready,” Nate said, holding Ava tightly, “And mine is getting cold, and I want to try and get into the bathroom before the morning rush. Or at least before Zari. And Ava?”

“Yeah?” Ava said, taking her coffee mug from the fabricator.

“Eventually, everything is going to be ok.”

…

Sara sat curled in the captain’s chair, having long since lost track of time as she gazing out into the time-stream, watching the hypnotic green waves of time swirl and pass by, hoping she’d fall asleep again before the rest of the team. It had been three nights since she’d moved back to their bedroom, but once again she’d had multiple nightmares during the night, and had decided that trying to go back to sleep again wasn’t worth it, as well as feeling that it wasn’t fair on Ava to keep waking her.

“There you are,” a not unwelcome voice said.

“Hi,” Sara said, looking up at Ava with a hoody thrown over her matching navy satin pyjamas. “Sorry if I woke you. And sorry I stole your dressing-gown again. And sorry I did wake you during the night.”

“More like sorry that you give me a heart attack when I woke up just now and you weren’t there.”

“Oh, sorry,” Sara said. “I had planned to come back, I just… I couldn’t get back to sleep after the last dream and I…”

“You don’t need to explain yourself,” Ava smiled softly. “Gideon told me you were out here.”

“What time is it?” Sara asked.

“Quarter to six.”

“Huh. Guess I’ve been here a while then.”

“Are you going to go back to bed?” Ava asked.

Sara shrugged and sighed. “Maybe after some breakfast? I don’t know. Probably.”

“Are you ok?”

Sara sighed again. “Apart from the fact I can’t sleep without dreaming? And all the dreams are bad? At least you’re here to wake me up when I can’t pull myself out of them.”

“When did it get like this?” Ava asked.

“Almost right away,” Sara replied. It had taken a bit of time, but since she and Ava had gotten together, they’d come up with strategies and plans to manage, and in some instances eliminate, Sara’s nightmares. This felt like a huge set-back, much to Sara’s frustration.

“We’ll get it sorted, ok?” Ava said, holding Sara’s hands. “Don’t be too hard on yourself. We’ll get back into a proper nighttime routine, and - ”

“And you’re here,” Sara said, giving Ava a small smile. “I know it might take a bit of time, because I’ll be honest, it’s never been this bad, and I hate putting the burden on you to help me but…”

“Sara, hey, you are never a burden on me, ok? Nothing you ask, nothing you need is ever that.”

Sara nodded and blinked back tears. “It’s just never been this bad.”

“Babe, you’ve been back for a few days. We’ll sort this out, ok? Come on, come back to bed. We can have a cuddle before I need to start herding the cats.”

Sara chuckled and allowed Ava to pull her to her feet. “I really love you,” Sara mumbled, holding onto Ava’s arm as they made their way past the console.

Ava kissed the top of Sara’s head. “I love you too.”

…

The team had gone out on a mission, leaving only Sara and John on board the Waverider. A week had passed since she’d turned up at Felicity’s apartment, and after a few days with everyone hanging around on the Waverider, there were more than a few cases which needed to be dealt with.

“You know I don’t need baby-sitting,” Sara said. “Gideon’s here, and the worst that will happen is I fall asleep.”

“You do look wrecked, love,” John said.

“Gee, thanks,” Sara said, sitting down on the steps leading up to her office. She had quarter-backed a mission the day prior with Ava and Behrad both staying behind, and was doing so again, though this time just with John. It felt good to be working again, even if she was exhausted as a result of disturbed sleep and generally readjustment back to ‘real’ life. “Would it sound insane if I said I am feeling better, though?”

“Not at all,” John said. “Can’t Gideon give you something for the nightmares?”

“Not really,” Sara said. “What I need is so strong that it turns me into a zombie when I’m not asleep, and it’s hard enough to try and get my shit together, I don’t need to be effectively tranquillised on top of it.”

“But you are getting your shit together?” John asked sitting beside Sara.

Sara gave a small smile. “Like I said, I am feeling better. So much better than a week ago. And I know a week from now, I’ll be feeling exponentially better again. But I am so fricken tired. I have no energy, no libido, the smell of most food makes me want to be sick. Gideon’s got me taking these fizzy dissolvable tablets she’s devised to try and fast-track getting some vitamins and minerals back in my body. She’ll check tomorrow to see how they’re working and if whatever’s in them needs to be adjusted, which hopefully it can be, along with the taste because they are awful.”

“My apologies, Captain Lance, though as I’ve explained - ”

“Yeah, I know Gideon,” Sara said. “It’s medicine, not candy.”

“Can’t you mix is with whisky?” John asked.

“Absolutely not, Mr Constantine,” Gideon interjected. “The effect of alcohol on the tablets would mean that - ”

“All right, all right Gideon!” John laughed. “No meds and drink. I got it.”

“No drink at all,” Sara said. “Though that would probably just make me sick too.”

“You really had a number pulled on you this time, eh?” John said.

Sara shrugged. “I guess, but I’ve got Ava and all of you. You know nearly better than anyone the hell I’ve been through before, more than once, and I always come out the other side. It just sucks being back in this position, having to fight like this again, to go through all the mental and physical shit to get somewhere close to good again. But I will. Give me time and I’ll be ok. Honestly at the moment, I’m more worried about Ava.”

“You’ve noticed that, huh?” John asked.

Sara picked at invisible fluff on her sweatpants. “It’s like our systems work in opposite. Some days she’s so good first thing in the morning, but as the day goes on the cracks begin to show, and by bedtime… Well, I’m the opposite. My mind’s a mess during the night and in the morning, but as the day goes on I pull myself together and by time we’re going to bed, I almost feel good. And then other days we’re the other way around.”

“Well that sucks,” John said.

Sara gave a wry smile. “At least we know where we stand, I guess.” 

“I hope you don’t think I’ve got anything helpful to add in here, love, because I’ve got nothing helpful to say.”

“Well that’s a relief,” Sara smirked, “Because you are not the person I would be going to for help.”

“So, what, I’m just someone to offload to, then?”

“And a wonderful listener you are too,” Sara said, patting John on the shoulder before pushing herself to her feet. “All right, Gideon, how’s everyone tracking?”

…

“I think I’d like to go somewhere,” Sara said. They were lying in bed, Sara content to lounge about while Ava read. Though Sara didn’t say anything, she was sure that the books beside Ava’s bed were the same ones that were there before she was abducted.

Ava looked up from her book. “What do you mean?”

“Like a vacation,” Sara said, propping herself up onto her elbows. “For at least a couple of weeks. Somewhere warm.”

“The fresh air and sunshine might do you good,” Ava said, sliding the bookmark into her book. “It might do us all some good.”

Sara nodded. “I think so too. But no beaches or big expanses of water. Or jungle or forest. Or desert. Or big, noisey, busy cities, but not super remote. Or anything remotely related to boats.”

“Ok,” Ava said, putting her book aside and grabbing her iPad. “America or somewhere foreign? English-speaking or it doesn’t matter? You’re better at foreign languages than me. What about - ” Ava paused and looked at Sara who had slumped back against her pillows. “Are you ok?”

Sara swallowed and closed her eyes. “I’m just so tired. I am so tired and I…” she held onto Heavy Shark and tried to control her breathing.

“I’ll find somewhere for us to escape to,” Ava said softly, planning pull Sara into her arms as soon as she could, but aware that for the moment, it was likely Sara needed the distraction of spur-of-the-moment vacation planning more.

“Somewhere warm, and peaceful, with rolling green hills and little villages. France, perhaps?” Ava thought out-loud. "I’d say England, but that doesn’t really fit the ‘warm’ requirement. I’m sure there’s some nice place in France we can escape to for a couple of weeks.”

Sara nodded. “Maybe a chateau?” she asked, opening her eyes and looking up at Ava. “You know what the kids are like,” she said with a small smirk.

Ava grinned. “A very large, multi-bedroom chateau it is, since they’ll never let us go without them.”


	5. Chapter 5

Ava opened a portal with the time courier to the town of Honfleur on the northern French coast, and she and Sara stepped through with their suitcases in tow. They quickly located a cab to take them to the chateau they had rented for a fortnight, and chattered happily as the cab took them through the town and the gently rolling countryside to the chateau. As it came into view, they knew they’d made the right choice with the exquisite fourteen-bedroom property. Since it was their idea, and had done all the booking with assistance from Gideon, they were going as the vanguard and having the afternoon to themselves before the rest of the Legends showed up in time for a proper French meal for dinner, as Ava had elected to have the catering provided four days a week.

Upon their arrival, they met the owner who offered to show them around, but as they were pretending to be jet-lagged from the flight from America (taking a cab from Honfleur had been Sara’s idea to create the illusion they were somewhat normal customers), he was happy enough to leave them be to unpack and explore the chateau and grounds themselves.

Having dropped their bags in the grand entrance hall, they set about exploring the chateau, calling to one another like excited children as they found another magnificent room or another grand view of the grounds.

“Don’t forget we should check out the cottage before everyone else arrives as well,” Ava called from the winding staircase.

“It’s going to take us days to get used to staying here,” Sara called back with a grin. “Hey, Ava? Can this be our room?”

“Which one is it?” Ava called, not entirely sure where Sara was.

“It has a massive bed and tasteful pictures of naked women on the wall.”

Ava appeared behind Sara and looked in the room.

“And I like the chandelier,” Sara grinned. “There’s no ensuite, but is every room in the house going to be used? There’s three bathrooms on this floor and six bedrooms, so I’m sure we can claim one just for us.”

“I think in theory we were going to have the room with the suite, but we can have this one if you like,” Ava said. “Even if we don’t have an ensuite.”

“Do you like this one?” Sara asked. “Or do you want the one with the suite?”

“I actually like this one,” Ava said, having a better look around. She opened the doors to the cupboards and looked at the shelves stuffed with extra pillows and blankets up high, and the empty space for their things below. “Considering our normal bathroom situation on the Waverider, I can deal with this. I saw the other room and it’s a bit flashy or something. This one is cosier, and that view of the grounds is amazing. Look at the fountain! I like that it has a couch, and the huge wardrobe space.”

“So we should bring our bags up and claim this room for ourselves?”

“Benefits of getting here first,” Ava said, taking Sara’s hand. “I think Zari will like the bedroom with the suite.”

“Agreed. Or Astra,” said Sara as they made their way back down the hallway to the exquisite staircase.

“You’re not worried about going up and down the stairs all the time?” Ava asked, unable to banish her ongoing concern for Sara’s health despite the distraction of the amazing property.

“I’m fine,” Sara said, suppressing a yawn.

Ava turned and looked back up at her.

“Ok, fine, I’m tired, but I’m very happy to be here, and I can’t wait to let the kids lose in this place. They’re going to love it,” Sara smiled.

…

Zari, John, Astra and Behrad arrived at the chateau a few hours later, and much like Sara and Ava before them, explored the house with enthusiasm and claimed whichever bedroom they pleased.

“The others might come later, but it turns out they’ve managed to screw up their mission in nineteenth-century Japan,” Astra called and as she hauled her suitcase upstairs. “I guess they’ll be in touch?”

Ava looked at Sara, and Sara smirked. “I am sure they have screwed things up for the better,” she said.

“Mmm,” Ava sighed, though she was hardly surprised, having done more than enough missions with the Legends to know these sort of issues were more common than not, and she really shouldn’t let it bother her.

Since the group was smaller than expected, they were able to dine inside in the formal dining room, with it’s marble floor, gold leaf on the walls and opulent chandelier. The meal was delicious, and the wine was exceptional. Sara stuck to bread and butter, trying only a taste of Ava’s duck and beans with shallots.

Once the main course was done, Sara excused herself and headed upstairs to their top-floor bedroom, grateful that at least for tonight, she and Ava were the only ones sleeping on this level, as the others had selected the larger ensuite bedrooms on the floor below. She enjoyed a soak in the bath, and was standing at the open bedroom window looking over the grounds, the refreshing evening breeze blowing in when Ava entered.

“Hi,” Ava said, wrapping her arms around Sara’s waist and resting her chin on Sara’s shoulder.

“Hi,” Sara said, placing her hands on top of Ava’s.

“Ready for bed already?” Ava asked, as Sara was dressed in her own long pyjamas and Ava’s dressing-gown, even though the night was mild.

Sara nodded. “At least one night we’ll have to share a bath.”

“Of course,” Ava said. “Are you feeling all right?”

“Just tired,” Sara said, and turned her head to look at Ava. “Honestly.”

Ava kissed Sara’s neck. “Heavy Shark looks tiny on that massive bed compared to on our bed.”

Sara chuckled. “I’m looking forward to trying the bed out. I’m glad we’re here.”

“Me too,” Ava said. “You’ve probably seen my Lonely Planet France book, and - ”

“And all the things in the area that you’ve marked to see and do?”

Ava nodded.

“Do you mind if I mostly just stay here, though? At least for the first few days?” Sara asked. “I’m - it’s just… everything is still a lot.”

“I know,” Ava said. “And I understand. Ray and Nora are coming tomorrow, and between them and Nate and Zari and everyone else, I’ll always have someone to go exploring with. It’ll still be fun, and the whole time I’ll know I have you to come home to. To be honest, I think this will be good for everyone. I think we’re all in need of a change of scenery.”

“I do help this helps,” Sara said.

“I think it is already,” Ava replied. “I’ve smiled more since we got here than I have since you - you were…”

“Me too,” said Sara. “How was dessert?”

“We had a traditional _Teurgoule_ , which is a type of rice pudding, and tasted divine.”

“Hopefully I get my appetite back soon,” Sara said. “French bread is second-to-none, but I would like to be able to stomach some other foods as well. And the wine.”

“Oh, the wine was really good,” Ava said. “You’ll get there, babe.”

“I know,” Sara said, leaning against Ava. “Thank-you for being patient with me.”

“Always,” said Ava. “I might go and have a bath, then we can have an early night in our massive bed.”

“It is a massive bed.”

“It’s huge,” Ava said. “Good choice on this room, babe.”

“Thanks, babe. Somehow, it feels the most ‘us’.”

“Agreed,” Ava said, grabbing her pyjamas. “Want to join me? Not literally in the bath, since you’ve already had one, unless you really want to, but - ”

“I will bring this armchair,” Sara said, picking up the armchair and following Ava out of the bedroom. “And happily quarter-back your bath.”

…

By the middle of the following morning, Ava had drawn up a chart of activities, asking the Legends to put their names down for the various outings they wished to go on, as they currently only had one hire-car which Nate had picked up in Honfleur, so spaces were limited. Later in the week they would receive additional guests who who also provide an additional hire car, but for now car seating was at a premium.

Sara was enjoying the opportunity to not have to do very much at all. The multiple nightmares remained, and Ava was kind enough to bring up their breakfast on a tray, which they ate in bed. By mid-morning, Ava was likely to be off on one of the outings she had planned, while Sara lingered in their bedroom. She couldn’t decide if she needed to go out and try to be distracted, or if she’d end up feeling overwhelmed and need to return to the chateau sooner the anticipated, thereby spoiling the outing.

Sara stood at the window overlooking the gardens and when she saw Felicity crossing the lawn to the chateau and a smile crept across her face. She wondered when Ava was returning from her morning adventure, and sent her a quick message. Sara threw on some proper clothes and went downstairs, entering the hall at the same moment that Felicity stepped through the door.

“Oh my god, I’m so glad you’re ok and alive,” Felicity said, throwing her arms around Sara’s shoulders.

For a moment Sara tensed, but then she wrapped her arms around Felicity’s waist, relaxing into her embrace. “I’m so glad you could make it.”

“Thank-you for inviting us, and letting us stay for a week, and this is all so amazing already, but I’m just so glad you’re ok, Sara. I am so glad you’re ok,” Felicity said, all the words coming out at once. “Obviously you’re way too skinny, I can feel that through your t-shirt, but you probably know that, and at least you look better than when you showed up at my place the other week. When Ray called me ages ago now to say you’d been kidnapped by aliens I didn’t know what to expect or what to think, and I wanted to help but I felt so helpless because there was nothing I could do and… I’m sorry, I’m babbling and I’m probably squeezing you.”

“It’s fine,” Sara said as Felicity let go and took a step back. “It’s really good to see you. You did bring the kids, yeah?”

“They’re over at the cottage,” Felicity said. “As soon as they saw the pool, they were not leaving and I was not going to make them. After a long-haul flight, and then the drive up from Paris, they deserve a little down time. We got here about half an hour ago, just enough time for William to make a complete mess of his room while trying to find his bathers. There’s a port-a-cot in my room for Mia which is super helpful, and William’s very glad he won’t have to share. Though next week we’re spending the week in Paris and the three of us will have one big hotel room, so that will be fun. I’ve bought us a two-day pass for Disneyland Paris, but have realised that trying to navigate it with a toddler and a teenager might be a bit more a challenge than I originally thought. Oh, Ray, Nora and Nate are watching them at the pool. I think Will and Nate are buddies already, and Nora is lovely, and it is so great seeing Ray again and - I’m still babbling.”

“Yeah,” Sara smiled. “Jet lag?”

“I am so tired,” Felicity said. “The kids are operating purely on adrenaline and I think I am too, so it will be early nights and probably meltdowns all round. William played video games for thirteen hours straight on the plane, and Mia spent a good number of hours screaming for no reason, and I had no sleep at all, because even when Mia was asleep, she insisted on sleeping on me, which was very comfortable for me, but the whole cabin appreciated the silence so it’s gunna be an early night for us all.”

“Do you want something to drink? Tour of the house?” Sara asked.

“Both would be nice,” Felicity said. “Though if I have alcohol I will fall straight to sleep. This place is amazing, by the way. Have I said that? I don’t know if I’ve said that. Gosh, I’m tired.”

“I know the feeling,” Sara said, leading the way into the library.

“Tomorrow I will make you proper Jewish chicken soup.”

“Can you cook now?” Sara teased.

“I am a single mom, now. I don’t have a choice. Most meals are somewhere between a bit rubbish and ok, but my chicken soup is incredible. Oh my god, look at this kitchen.”

“There’s a kitchen in the cottage too,” Sara said.

“Yeah, but this - Sara, this is like a dream kitchen. This is amazing. I am making you soup. No protesting. Ray can help. He probably has a Jewish chicken soup recipe of his own. We can have a soup-off.”

Sara chuckled.

“Blondie. Ponytail.”

“Oh, hey Mick,” Sara said. “I didn’t know you were here.”

Mick just grunted, took a beer from the fridge and left the kitchen again.

“You didn’t know he was here?” Felicity asked.

Sara shrugged as she poured Felicity a glass of cold water. “It’s a big house. I don’t get around much. I - you know I’m still not real well, right?”

Felicity gulped down the water and poured herself another glass. “Yeah, I’ve heard. I’m sorry about that. If there’s anything you need…”

Sara nodded. “I’m a lot better than when I showed up at your place, and I will be eternally grateful to you for taking care of me and Ava, but… I think being here helps? I don’t know, we’ve only been here for a couple of days. I’m trying, but it’s hard, and I feel like shit most of the time.”

“I am making you so much soup,” Felicity said, sipping the water.

“I’m really glad you guys could come,” Sara smiled. “Come on, if you’ve had enough to drink, let’s go see if Ava’s back, and regardless, I need to say hi to the kids.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the estate they're staying at:
> 
> https://www.oliverstravels.com/france/normandy/domaine-du-pont-entire-estate/   
> https://excellenceluxuryvillas.com/rent-villas-chalets-chateaux-safari-lodges/france-normandy-northern-france-belgium/domaine-du-pont-1   
> https://excellenceluxuryvillas.com/rent-villas-chalets-chateaux-safari-lodges/france-normandy-northern-france-belgium/domaine-du-pont-farmhouse-france 
> 
> The top link has the best pictures, and the other two give the floor plans. Thinking about staying at a property like that is real wishful thinking/escapism right now!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I bet everyone who looked at the pictures of the chateau from the links in the previous chapter decided on which bedroom they'd choose if they got to stay there 😉

The Legends and their guests more or less fell into a routine, usually opting to go on one of the trips Ava had planned each day in either the morning or afternoon, and spending rest of the time eating, relaxing and lounging by the pool. Gideon had been asked not to interrupt unless something catastrophic was happening, but if it could be managed by some sort of cross-over, they were to be happily excluded, and had no qualms about not knowing until after the crisis was past.

Felicity and Ray had put the local produce and huge kitchen in the chateau to good use by each making a big batch of chicken soup with matzo balls. Everyone tried a little bit of each, and though no clear winner could be determined, there appeared to be a fairly even split as to who went back to which soup for seconds. As Felicity had suspected, the person who most enjoyed and most benefitted from the soup was Sara. Though late summer was hardly the time of year for soup, within forty-eight hours of having two cups of soup a day, along with plenty of French bread and butter, Sara had more colour in her cheeks, and was starting to wear more seasonally appropriate clothing. Felicity knew that it could be a whole lot of factors which were helping, but she liked to think a big part of it was the soup.

Ava had rolled out of bed still half asleep that morning, after another interrupted night’s sleep. She tried to find comfort in the fact that Sara was now ‘only’ have about three nightmares a night, instead of the five or so she’d been having when she had first returned, but it was still tiring for them both.

“You know the one upside of this?” Sara had asked during the night after Ava had calmed her from a nightmare.

“Hmm?” Ava asked, sceptical there could be any upside.

“At least this way I know this is real,” Sara had said, snuggling into Ava’s side, with Heavy Shark lying comfortingly against her back. “If it was too perfect, I might think it was a fantasy. But this way… I know I’m really here. It isn’t perfect, but at least it’s real.”

Ava, Felicity with Mia, Zari, and Charlie, who had joined the Legends at the chateau the night prior, had spent the morning wandering around Honfleur and visiting the renowned Saturday market, soaking up the atmosphere, people-watching and shopping. They’d returned to the chateau with all manner of goods for lunch, including breads, cheeses, cured meats, fruit, and plenty of wine.

“Zari, leave that!” Felicity said as Zari snuck another piece of cheese into her mouth.

“It isn’t everyday that one gets to gorge oneself on fancy French cheese, right Ava?” Zari asked, hoping Ava would back her up. “Ava?”

“Hmm?”

“Are you listening?” Zari asked.

Ava looked up from the charcuterie board she was creating. She liked being able to concentrate purely on the task at hand, but as it wasn’t particularly complex, her mind had began to wander. “Just thinking about Sara,” she said. She hadn’t seen Sara looking out the bedroom window when they’d arrived back at the chateau, nor was she hanging out with the others down at the pool, nor was she in any of the communal spaces in the chateau. Ava assumed she was still up in their room, but wasn’t sure she wanted to climb the three flights of stairs just to see Sara curled on the bed, holding Heavy Shark and lost in her own thoughts.

“She’ll come downstairs when she’s ready,” Zari said with an encouraging smile. “It’s not unusual for her to stay upstairs until lunchtime.”

Ava nodded, but Zari’s words didn’t make her feel any better. “It’s just…slow,” Ava mumbled, turning back to her perfectly laid out charcuterie board, which just the right mix of cheese, meats, and complimentary foods. “I mean, I knew it would be slow, and I know these things take time. Of course they do. And Sara is so… god, she’s so good about it all. She’s so patient with herself, and with me and I…” Ava swallowed and looked at the bench. “What if I’m not enough? What if she needs more than me?” Ava asked in a small voice.

Zari wiped her hands on the towel then went and wrapped her arms around Ava. “You are exactly who she needs,” Zari said. “And we have to trust that if Sara thought she needed more help, she would say. I know you’ve been doing it tough, and Sara being back has made some things a bit easier but has created a whole lot of new problems, but you guys together… you’re pretty damn perfect. Just like that CatChat-worthy charcuterie board you’ve made.”

“CatChat?” Felicity asked.

“Future-era social media,” Ava said. “Z, this isn’t the halal board.”

“No, but it’s the prettiest,” Zari said, letting go of Ava to whip out her phone and start taking photos of the food from all angles.

“All right, you lot nearly ready with the food?” Charlie asked, entering the kitchen.

“Zari’s been stealing all the cheese,” Felicity said.

“Sounds about right,” Charlie said, flashing Zari a grin before slicing a piece of cheese for herself. “Is Sara joining us?”

“Don’t know,” Ava said. “She usually comes down for lunch. Here, you can take this down to the pool? We’ll join you shortly.”

“No worries,” Charlie said. “I’ll send a couple of the others up to get more stuff, yeah?”

“That’d be great,” Ava sad with a strained smile before throwing a few things into the sink, while Felicity tried to coerce Mia to eat something rather than just smear food all over her face, hands and clothes, and Zari finished the last of the lunch boards.

“Babe, you are a genius,” Sara said, entering the kitchen, walking straight up to Ava and giving her a kiss on the lips.

“What did I do?” Ava asked, looking at Sara in bare feet, with her hair askew and her top all crinkled.

“I just had a four-hour nap and I feel amazing,” Sara grinned. “I wasn’t even trying to sleep, but I was lying on the bed with Heavy Shark and I put on StabCast because I am super behind and thought I might as well listen to a couple of episodes, but I fell asleep with your lovely voice talking enthusiastically about serial killers, and woke up ten minutes ago to the same. And I didn’t have any dreams.”

“StabCast?” Felicity asked Zari quietly.

“Ava’s serial killer podcast. It’s actually quite good,” Zari replied.

“So all I have to do is talk all night, and you’ll be ok?” Ava asked Sara, holding her hands.

Sara chuckled. “We’ll figure something out, but right now, do you want to go for a walk? I feel like going for a walk. Usually I’d suggest sparring, but I should probably get a little bit of general fitness back before I launch into that. Plus if we tried sparring inside we’d definitely break something.”

“But the grounds are full of lovely, plush grass, just waiting for us.”

“Maybe a little session outside wouldn’t be all bad,” Sara said.

“You know I packed the equipment, right?” Ava asked, feeling energy surge through her. “What about a walk around the grounds, then if you feel up to it, we can have a quick fifteen or twenty minute light sparring session afterwards?”

“Is ‘sparring’ a euphemism?” Felicity quietly asked Zari.

“Oh, no. They’re not that subtle,” said Zari. “And they take way longer than fifteen to twenty minutes.”

Felicity giggled.

Sara looked in their direction and poked out her tongue. “I’ll go get my sneakers and sunglasses.”

“And brush your hair!” Ava called and Sara gave a thumbs-up sign on her way out of the kitchen. “You’ll have to save us something to eat,” Ava said, looking at the spread of food.

“Let’s just make you up a seperate plate,” Felicity said, getting an extra plate out of the cupboard and handing it to Ava. “Just for you, or one for Sara too?”

“I’ll get things for both of us,” Ava said. “But I think there’s still soup in the fridge if she’d rather have that.”

“The boys will eat all of this if they get the chance,” Felicity said. “Heck, I’d eat all of it.”

“You’ve been picking at it since we got back,” Zari said.

“So have you,” replied Felicity with a cheeky grin. “It’s lucky you don’t eat this sort of food yet, Mia,” Felicity said to Mia, who had dropped bread all over the floor, and was currently mushing a strawberry into the high-chair table. “And you’re going to have to eat that mushy strawberry. Here, give it to mommy. Open your mouth. Good girl!”

“That’ll be you one day,” Zari said, bumping Ava’s hip and she slid past to the fridge.

“What?”

“Oh, please. Like you and Sara won’t one day have Gideon science you a baby. Or adopt.”

“We already have like ten kids,” Ava chuckled. “What about you and John?”

“What about Ray and Nora?” Zari said, ignoring the question. “I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re expecting already.”

“Oh, same here,” Felicity said, picking up a piece of baguette from the floor, dusting it off and handing it to Mia.

“You’re going to let her eat that?” Ava asked, trying not to pull a face.

“She licks the floor and puts everything she can get her hands on into her mouth,” Felicity said. “It’ll be fine.”

Sara returned to the kitchen wearing her sneakers, with her sunglasses hanging off the front of her top and her hair in a neat, high ponytail.

“Ready?” she asked Ava.

“We’ll be back,” Ava said to Zari and Felicity, taking Sara’s hand. “Sorry, can you please make me a plate? I kind of got distracted watching Felicity feed Mia floor-food.”

“I’m on it,” Zari said, taking the plate. “Felicity’s hands are now covered in baby slobber.”

“Thanks,” Ava said. “So you had a really good sleep then?” Ava asked Sara, closing the door as they stepped outside and Sara put on her sunglasses.

“Best I’ve had since I’ve been back that wasn’t initiated by sedatives,” Sara said. “I know this won’t be a total, permanent fix, but it’s something. It’s amazing what a few hours of decent sleep can do.”

Ava nodded, swinging their arms as they walked. “I’m just happy to see you so happy.”

Sara grinned. “I’m just happy to have any energy,” she said as they crossed the substantial plush, green lawns. “But are you ok?”

“Hmm?”

“You look a bit lost in your own world.”

“Oh, umm,” Ava swallowed and considered deflecting, but decided that wouldn’t be fair on Sara or herself. “I’m still worried that I let you down.”

Sara squeezed Ava’s hand. “You have never let me down, babe.”

Ava nodded and bit her lip to try and stop herself from getting overly emotional. She didn’t want to cry. She should be happy. Sara was feeling a bit better, she was smiling and had wanted to go for a walk. It had been a combination of things which included Ava’s podcast, something she had sadly and regrettably let fall aside during Sara’s absence, which had helped, no doubt assisted by a diet consisting almost entirely of Felicity’s chicken soup, fresh French bread and cheeses, and plenty of fresh air, even if most of it was from sitting by an open window.

“Hey, Ava?” Sara stopped and took both of Ava’s hands. “Look at me.”

Ava raised her eyes to look at Sara.

“Something Laurel said forever ago; I always find my way home. That’s you, Ava. Wherever you are, wherever you go, I am coming with you, because my home is with you. And wherever I am, whatever happens, I will always find my way back, my way home. So long as you leave a metaphorical light on, you will never let me down, and I will always come home.”

Ava swallowed, trying to force back tears. “Pinky swear?” she asked, holding out her finger.

“Always,” Sara smiled, wrapping her pinky around Ava’s before pulling her into a hug.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The End.
> 
> Thank-you so much everyone for reading, and all the kudos and comments. It really means a lot, and I hope it provided a bit of an escape for everyone. I'll be back with another Avalance AU shortly 😃


End file.
